May 7 & 8

Saturday and Sunday May 7 & 8, 2011 Amman

When I woke up Saturday morning I felt as though a cloud had been lifted. While I still very much had symptoms, I felt much better. On top of that the LCD screen on my camera was fully functional again. In passing I thought perhaps I had been oppressed by a demon, but irregardless, I was beaming at breakfast, knowing I had no more teaching to do but could sole concentrate on relationships which are so enjoyable.

So for the next day and half my focus was just that and how good it was. God granted me many opportunities to learn more about the conferees. There was a man from Bethlehem who lived within eyesight of the Church of the Nativity. How cool I thought until I read about the second infitada. I had forgotten the church became a refuge for armed militants and hostages for fifty some days back in 2003 and that the entire town was locked down, with people able only to go out for necessities for a couple of hours each day. There was a mom from Jerusalem who struggled with a teenage son with ADD and the disapproval of culture and even his church because of her son. I learned to the prevalence of drugs in Jerusalem; I met evangelical believers who are even mocked by other Christians. I met believers who only play Christian music in their hair salon which caters to the general public and who routinely witness people weeping as they listen to the music. A number of time, both here and Amman, I was struck by the sharing in the men’s group, how the language was different but what was being expressed I had heard a number of time before in Northwest Arkansas.

Sunday morning Luanne shared what a woman of Islamic upbringing had expressed about us. She commented on how lack of trust was such a huge issue in her culture, but she said that the unity of our team had caught her attention. She had never seen such a thing. The woman said we appeared as like a fishing net; if we see a tear in the net we immediately set in and repair the tear, handling each other weakness. She said we interact as through we are family, and, of course, in a very real sense we are.

The attendance at the conference had been cut if half due to Sunday being the beginning of the work week in Jordan. However those who were still in attendance were committed and invested. Wahid and his two associates left late on Sunday morning amid much thanks and emotion. Larry shared how he has recycled his pain as Rodney closed with the last lesson and then we entered a time of worship and prayer. Larry, Luanne and I had the privilege of praying for many different people as Rodney, Angela and Rand provided music and Don made recordings and photos. Afterward we too said our good-byes and I gave away my CR Bible to a conferee I had promised it to earlier. Apparently duty taxes make getting Christian materials very expensive in the Middle East. The joy in her face was unlike anything I have experienced since my boys were little and got just the right gift.

Later in the afternoon as I met Adham to return his guitar I ran into a Jersulam believer who had a chronic pancreatic infection which had flaired up the night before. We prayed for her safe and quick return to home in Jerusalem, especially passing through the border checkpoints. We received work the next day that she indeed made it home and was resting safe and well.

That night we went to the home of Gus and Fairous, a couple who had helped Rand put together the conference. Gus seems very keen on bring CR to Amman. A very dedicated couple who are both active in ministry in Amman they had some wonderful stories to share, particularly about their older son Daniel, how they had both been praying for a son by the name of Daniel with red hair, even though they did not know each other. Fairous was late in her child-bearing years when they married and many encouraged them not to start a family but they trusted the Lord and sure enough their first born was a red haired boy. They also have a cute daughter. In their home we met an Awana missionary that was staying with them while he was working in the region. It was good to see Sparky in Arabic. We also got to see Laila’s TV show at it was aired on a satellite network.

Fairous prepared a fabulous meal. After visiting for a bit longer we were all fading from the pace and health issues of the past two weeks and so, after praying for that dear family, we returned to our hotel for a good nights sleep because the next day was our play day, when we were to go to Petra.

May 6, 2011

I am the good shepherd; I know my sheep and my sheep know me— John 10:14

May 6, 2011 Amman

I will remember this night for a while. I was scheduled to teach twice the next day, initially giving my testimony and the lesson on Hope in the morning and then later on in the afternoon, teaching the Housekeeping Choice, where we confess our faults to myself, to God, and to someone we trust. I had taught both in Egypt so prepared enough but I still felt uncomfortable asking men and women to be transparent in a culture where there could be severe repercussions should their trust be violated. About one in the morning I was awaken by my coughing. It almost felt as though the infection in my sore throat had rolled down my airway as a ball and was now camped in my bronchial tubes and upper lungs. I spent the rest of the night restless, praying about the lessons and getting up to google a couple of Bible passages dealing with God’s way not being our way (Isaiah 55) and God using the foolish to shame the wise I Corinthians 1:27, verses I wanted to use in my opening. The reference John 10:14 kept coming into my mind. Off the top of my head I had no idea what it was so I googled it as well: I am the good shepherd; I know my sheep and my sheep know me. I took it to mean that God would not lead me to say anything that would harm anyone, that those who had ears to hear would do so, and that just as I needed to trust God in my life to lead me into good pastures, I need to trust him to do the same for these dear believers. It was only later, as I was reading my journal and starting to blog that I saw that passage I wrote back in January before the first trip was canceled, the one from Isaiah: He tends his flock like a shepherd: He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart; Isaiah 40:11. God obviously was staying on task even if I was wobbling about a bit.

Don and I had been running just after dawn through downtown Amman the past couple of days and he talked me into running that morning as well. I was trying to decide just how sick I was, so I figured I would go slow, turn around if I felt bad, and walk if need be. Well I did have to turn around and walk a fair part of the distance back to the hotel. My symptoms seemed to be getting worse. By the time we got to the conference site I sinuses were draining and I would cough so hard at times I feared I might black out. I took an Aleve and just prayed God would give me the strength to do so. Although I have no idea what I said that day and I had to lay down briefly between teaching (and miss Larry’s testimony), I was told I was coherent; even my nose held off draining while I taught. Wahid just smiled at me later saying God sometimes has to just physically take us out of the way so we can be of use.

Returning to the hotel I immediately crashed and slept for two hours. Don woke me about 7:30 p.m. and talked me into going down to get something to eat. Don was most kind to me; I sat off from everyone in the dining room, not wanting to spread my germs any more than I already had and Don joined me to keep me company, saying he was undoubtedly already been exposed. I appreciated and was comforted by his presence immensely; he is a good friend. Angela gave me some Nyquil and soon after dinner I fell into a long seven hour sleep.

May 5, 2011

May 5, 2011 Amman

The morning started off with a strong devotional time. The night before I was reading in Lightforce about Palestinian Christians, and how large numbers of Palestinians fled after the Irgun massacred 243 Arabs in the village of Deir Yassin, men, women and children, then took a few men as survivors to other villages to relate what the Irgun had done before then killing them as well. http://www.deiryassin.org/mas.html And of course, the West Bank has been under Israeli control since the 1967 war and has experienced two infitadas in which rubber bullets which can easily cause spinal injury and death, especially when used on young boys. This is part of the background of some of the Christians we had met the night before and would attend the conference. I shared what I had read and my own thoughts of how insignificant my testimony must seem in the light of such hardship, especially since many of my own difficulties were of my own making, not forced on me in my home by an occupying force.

Wahid in his unique comforting way reminded us of Romans, where Paul speaks of how when see abounds the more, so does the grace of God, and Angela added that it is not about our individual content, but about the process, that each of our stories is different but the common denominator is God’s healing power. It is comforting to know that regardless of our personal circumstances, God’s grace always proves sufficient to the believer who turns to Him when in suffering and tough circumstance, whether of his own making or not.

Wahid also shared with Larry architectural plans for a leadership training conference center he dreams of building just outside of Alexandria. You could see the excitement in Larry’s eyes. He is eager to come up with a development plan and I could see just how God has prepared him for just such a task

The conference started that afternoon. Rand was a bit disappointed in the turnout; he says there are so many conferences in Amman, even though this one is different, that the small numbers of Christians in Jordan are simply worn out by them. Still there is a strong contingent from the West Bank, Jerusalem, even as far away as Tel Aviv. In a way the smaller numbers have the advantage of more personal time with the people in our small groups. I renewed some friendships from Syria, particularly Adham, who could not attend anything but the opening session due to a youth retreat he was facilitating that weekend. He was quite kind to lend me his classical guitar for the weekend. Having the guitar was to bea simple pleasure. keeping my callouses from fading any further from non-use, but any thoughts I had harbored of playing for anyone was soon to be tossed aside as my sore throat was fixing to take a sharp turn south.